What’s not meant to be but is still desired is called lost hope. That’s how a broken spirit is made, with disappointment at it’s backbone. Hope makes you think you matter. What if none of us mattered at all? Then what would be the purpose of life? Do things really happen for a reason or do things just happen. As you read this you may not like what I have to say. We like to think we have a purpose because if we didn’t then there would be nothing to live for. We would just wait around until we croaked. It’s comforting to believe that life has purpose. But what if it doesn’t? What if the only meaning we have in life is the meaning that we create. So, make yourself happy, take risks, and live life.

The other day I was driving on a rainy day and saw a car in the embankment on the side of a highway. All I saw was a man laying across the hood of his car while police officers surrounded him. I can’t get the haunting image of the driver’s brown loafers and blue jeans out of my head. I started to weep. I am not religious in the sense that I actively practice religion and take part in church life, but I do my own thing and pray to God and pray with loved ones who have passed. I do not like the institution of religion for various reasons. I do not need the promise of heaven in order to live my life as a good and moral person. Nonetheless, I prayed for this man and his family that they may find peace, and for the other car involved in the accident who appeared to be okay. He was probably driving along, when all of a sudden he spun out of control and everything ended. We may not know why we are here, we may not know our purpose, but the only thing we know is that we are here now and we should try to make the best of it for as long as we can because who knows what is in store for us after our time in this world is up. Don’t worry about the judgements of others. Live how you want to live. It is your life! Hoping for anything more than what we have now is like waiting for a ship to arrive that may have never even left it’s port. I myself worry about every little thing. I wish for things to change– I live in the future. I think of everything I may have done wrong and I cringe–I live in the past. I live in my head; I live everywhere except here and now.

Getting back to hope, it is a powerful concept. It can help us get through the days, it can give us the illusion that things will change or get better. This may be true some of the time. But sometimes “hope breeds eternal misery.” Hoping for something that never comes to fruition is the most devastating feeling in the world. Things that happen to us may not make sense because we had some preconceived notion or we hoped that these events would have turned out differently. Maybe what happened was not meant to be, maybe it just is.

Be at peace, not in pieces.

Sabrina

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