I’m terrified of living a mediocre life. I’m scared of having that same moment of “this is it?” that I had in my near death experiences. Thinking that this may be it…this may be the end yet this may be all that I get to live. What have I accomplished or experienced? (And I am so young.) I’ve definitely experienced fleeting moments of happiness and love and fun. But what’s the big picture? What will make me ok with exiting this earth knowing I have accomplished? I want a worthwhile story. I want a story worth telling. I want to inspire and to be inspired. I want to be more passionately loved and adored and to love myself and love the life I have created. I don’t want to look back knowing I could have done more, or worse, knowing I could have done better. I met an older man on a train once, he told me all the places he has visited and lived and how he is married and has a child. I thought to myself, wow, this man has seen so much and had so many different careers and experiences and recreated his life in every place yet and he now is settled down and appears happy. I love hearing life stories of older people I meet. The further they have traveled, the more intrigued I become. I think of all the adventures they must have gone on. Maybe it wasn’t all peaches and cream but I used to think that was a life worth talking about. I want to be able to say I saw things and went places and did everything to the best of my ability. I want my tombstone to have so much to say that they need to use 8-point font to fit it all.
Go on this journey with me, Reader?